The waiting season is when you aren’t quite who you used to be but you’re still waiting to grow into the new version of yourself. This season can be frustrating because you’re unsure of what your next steps are. You know you’ve outgrown many things but you don’t know what will replace what has been outgrown. As a recent graduate and someone who just switched careers, I am right in the middle of my waiting season. I’ve been pondering ways to make the waiting season work for me instead of me being a slave to the waiting season.
If there is one thing I’ve learned since I graduated, it’s that life doesn’t automatically get better in the presence of material items or specific opportunities. Sometimes we get those items and/or opportunities and we’re still not happy. Happiness doesn’t reside anywhere, it is created. We must be persistent about finding joy daily and making space to keep it there. I haven’t fully found what fulfills me yet so the best thing for me to do right now is explore instead of hyper-focusing on what I’m waiting on. If this resonates with you, continue to do your part and take control of your life right now. Here are a few ways to do so!
1. Find Joy in Everything
Finding joy on a daily basis is the main thing that has gotten me out of ruts. Most of us live life on auto-pilot and move throughout the day without realizing all the beautiful things that happened. Start finding the joy in everything you can. Be joyous about the small moments:
- when someone asks if you need help with something
- when a stranger smiles at you
- when the sunset is a perfect mix of pink and orange
- when you eat your favorite meal and it’s just right
All these moments matter and are worth the acknowledgment.
2. Be Unapologetic about Celebrating Yourself
As a retiring perfectionist, I know how hard it is to be proud of what I’ve done when I know I’m not quite yet where I want to be. Getting out of this pattern took me over a year and I am constantly working towards letting perfectionism go. The thing about perfectionism is pretty obvious – it doesn’t exist. Someone once said this quote to me: “Perfection doesn’t exist but your idea of perfection can exist” and it changed my perspective on what becoming my best self looked like.
The first step to celebrating yourself is to acknowledge that you’ve already done exceedingly well. Period. We often talk about ourselves and add the words “but, only, or just” and that downplays what we’ve done. There is nobody that can tell you what is worth celebrating except you. You got out bed today? Celebrate. You chose strength in moments of discomfort? Celebrate. You didn’t react like you used to? Celebrate.
Give yourself the permission to be proud of you. If you offend some people in the process, that’s okay because their offense isn’t yours to carry.
3. Release Resistance & Accept Change
Whew, this is a hard one! Sometimes we know an ending is approaching and we try to avoid it at all costs. We hang on to things that no longer serve us because we don’t know what is on the other side of it. Resisting change only makes it harder for to weather the change. It’s so valid to know that a specific change absolutely sucks and it still needs to happen anyway. We call that Radical Acceptance.
Releasing resistance doesn’t necessarily mean you like what’s happening, it means that you are no longer trying to control what you can’t control. When you accept change, you are making space for all of the new beautiful things that are coming your way.
4. Put the Work Down
Stop overworking yourself. Self care may seem impossible for you right now and I want you to know that your goal will not be further to reach if you choose to rest or take a day for yourself. Your goal will actually be closer because you are equipped enough to go through the process of accomplishing the goal. We delay our own blessings when we don’t rest. There is a time to grind and there is a time to rest. Learn to discern the difference.
A great way to get in the habit of making time for yourself is creating weekly/monthly rituals that you dedicate yourself to. This could look like scheduling the 3rd Saturday of every month off, getting a massage every 2nd Monday of the month, taking 1 weekly yoga class and so on. When this day comes, put everything aside and take that time for yourself no matter what. (Unless there is a real life EMERGENCY) Scheduling days in advance gives you less room to change your mind. My current rituals involve a monthly massage membership and Mondays being the day where I have no meetings. It truly does make a difference!
5. Shift your Focus
Get a hobby! No seriously, get a hobby. Hobbies help shift your focus away from the things that are bringing you distress, decreases overthinking and allows you to simply enjoy a task. I recently started making mini vlogs on Tik Tok because they’re fun! I love creating them because my creativity comes out to play in the process. I also have some books on the shelves that I bought years ago and have yet to read! I’m currently reading the Mountain in You. Find what you love and do way more of it.
Above all, meet yourself where you’re at and remember that just because you’re in your waiting season doesn’t mean there is an absence of opportunity. Ground yourself where you are now and utilize this season to the best of your ability. The seeds you plant now will soon grow and flourish in your next season. Don’t give up, the best is yet to come. Have fun in the meantime!
Until next time,